The key is in micro-moments of positive resonance
I loved the linkage to last week's article when you talked about mindfulness and the 2 arrows! What really caught my eye was the relationship between responding to bids and divorce, I never thought that such small moments can impact the health of a relationship. I'm also very excited to read your paper on the potential linkage between performing RAK and cultivating self-compassion. Some ways I can bring more of these micro-moments into my life would be to become a more attentive person and express my appreciation to strangers as well as family and friends.
This is my favorite article so far. I completely agree with the point that in order to love others, you must first show love and compassion toward yourself. This point reminded me of Oprah Winfrey's famous quote, " Your life is a journey of learning to love yourself first and then extending that love to others in every encounter." I will certainly be paying more attention to others' words after reading Dr.John Gottman's list of bids as I felt shocked at how often I hear similar things but dismiss or don't think much of them.
love the compactness of this one 👌🏼❤️
This article is really eye-opening! I think we really undermine the little things in relationships, we tend to think they're not important but this article showed otherwise. It was really surprising to see that divorce rates are so much higher when bids are ignored. I also loved when you said we should treat ourselves like friends because I think we as humans are naturally hard on ourselves so its a nice reminder to try to be kinder to yourself.
This is my favorite article so far! so well written and expressed. Reading about the bids was so interesting and important to me, now i learned how to use these bids to fix and progress any relationship with family and friends. I also love how you mentioned that we should get used to giving rather than constantly receiving, a very important point that everyone should start getting used to, including myself! thank you so much for this amazing article!!
I loved the subtle mentions and lessons of self compassion and self love. It really is true that you can’t love someone unless you love yourself. I do wonder though, many people manage to express their love to other people, however, their own self love and empathy isn’t great. How can this affect them as a person? And how do RAK benefit not only the recipient, but the person performing them as well?
I loved reading this article and all the aspects it discussed. A part I really loved in this article is how in order to give all your love and affection to someone, you need to achieve that on your own. You need to develop self love before committing to a relationship and being vulnerable, and I think this is extremely important because many people go into relationships giving their all when they haven’t developed that self love or confidence. I also loved the emphasis on “bids” and the list of things to focus on in a relationship. I think it reminds us to constantly pay attention to peoples’ words that tend to mean more than what we think.
i really enjoyed reading about bids and how responding to them can greatly impact a relationship!
I loved this article! Especially when talking about self compassion, I never realized it could start that easy. I've decided to follow Dr. Kristen Neff's three steps to achieve self compassion. I would love to be able to express my love for my loved ones (even strangers, just to put a smile on someone's face) through random acts of kindness.
I really enjoyed reading this article, especially the part explaining how a little bit of attention and care can go a long way and make a big difference in ones life relationships. I think that integrating this into our current relationships can also help create more positive micro-moments and overall strengthen our relationships with others.